Against All Odds
by exceptionallyordinarymarauder
Summary: Remus Lupin did not believe in love or happy endings... at least not for someone like him. He had settled for a life on his own, having lost all the people he cared about the most, when suddenly his life is flipped around once again. And maybe, just maybe, he might find that there is a happy ending for him after all.
1. Chapter 1

_I've been away,_

 _Searching for a reason_

 _Another purpose to find_

 _I've sailed the seas_

 _Fought m many demons_

 _I've looked to gods in the skies_

 _I've stood in hell_

 _Where many had to suffer_

 _I stared the devil in the eyes_

 _Walked many roads_

 _To witness ancient idols_

 _And found the great gates of fire_

 _Live again_

 _All roads end_

 _I'll be coming home_

 _Tend your light_

' _Cause on this night_

 _I'll be coming home_

(Avenged Sevenfold- Coming Home)

Remus:

"Never thought I'd see this place again. It feels just so weird to be back here." Sirius stared at the big black door in front of him, clearly hesitating to open it, biting down onto his lower lip.

"You all right there, mate?" I stepped closer to him and put a reassuring hand onto his shoulder. He started and cast a quick look at me, giving me a brief yet clearly forced smile. "Yes, of course. Well, let's have a look if it's still as awful as I remember, shall we?" With a sigh, he pushed the door open… a little harder than he had probably meant and it bumped into something with a resounding crash. Sirius' curse was immediately swallowed in a sound that bore a striking resemblance with the scream of a banshee. Mirroring Sirius, my hands shot up to cover my ears and I grimaced as I recognized the voice. "BLOOD TRAITORS, FILTH, HALFBREEDS, DARING TO STEP FOOT INTO THE HOUSE OF MY FATHERS!" Sirius turned his head to look at me and gave me sarcastic smile. "Home sweet home. Good to be back." His look turned bitter as he turned back around and started to look for the source of the commotion.

"What on earth is that?" I followed him, closing the door behind us and righting the clothes rack it had bumped into. "Thought you'd recognize my dear Mum's voice, even after all those years, Remus. I always considered her a hard one to forget, myself." Sirius voice dripped with bitterness and sarcasm.

"Oh, trust me, I remember her voice just fine. But as far as I remember, she died quite a while ago, didn't she? Must be a portrait or something, I guess." My best friend simply nodded and prowled down the hall, following the sound of the screeched insults uttered in his mother's voice.

Oh yes, I remembered Mrs Black just fine. The rest of the family as well. Casting a dark look at the lovely severed elf heads and other abominable sights next to the stairs, I followed Sirius, wincing at the continued onslaught of atrocities yelled at us. It had been quite some time since I had been here, the last time probably around the age of fifteen. I could still remember the horror at the sights this house provided and the people who lived in it. "Hah, there you are. Well, why don't you shut up now, you miserable old hag?" Sirius stood a little further down the hall staring into an alcove with his hands on his hips.

The voice grew even more menacing. "You! What are doing here? Last I heard, you were on the run from the Dementors. What do you think you're doing here, disgracing the house your ancestors lived in, you filthy little creature?" Sirius uttered a hard laugh. "Funny you should be the one to call me a filthy creature. Guess it is little hard for you to look into a mirror nowadays, isn't it."

When I stepped next to him, my eyes fell onto a portrait of an old woman I recognized immediately as Mrs Black. Her eyes shifted from Sirius to me and, I hadn't thought it possible, narrowed even more. "As if it isn't enough that this piece of filth is standing here in my house, he's brought the werewolf as well." The werewolf remark stung of course, but it was not as if I hadn't heard it before.

"Good to see you, too, Mrs Black."

Her lips pulled into snarl. "Shut your mouth and get out of my house, you abomination."

"Don't you dare call him that!" Sirius cut her off angrily, his eyes flashing dangerously and his hands shaking.

I held up a hand to tell him to back off and turned around to his mother's portrait again. "As far as I can tell, this is not your house anymore. You're dead, are you not? So, technically, it's Sirius' house now. He is the only Black left."

"This is not his house! It never will be. He is a disgrace to the House of Black, associating with werewolf and mudbloods and bloodtraitors…"

"Yes, yes, yes but nevertheless, I think it's time for you to shut up, now." I gave her another pleasant smile and before she could start another rant, I pointed my wand at her, put a sleeping spell on her and pulled the curtains in front of her closed with a snap. "Pleasant woman, isn't she." Sirius cast the curtains a dark look before turning around and letting his gaze roam the place, grimacing at what he saw.

I certainly agreed with him. Number Twelve, Grimmauld Place looked much as I remembered it from my visits back when we were kids, but it was much messier now and looked even darker and shadier if possible. The whole entrance hall seemed to be dark and gloomy and filled with cobwebs.

" I think it's time for a little light, don't you think?" I tried to keep my voice as pleasant and calm as possible, especially since I could practically see Sirius' mood plummeting by the increasingly disgruntled look on his face.

He gave me a curt nod and grimaced in disgust when the blast of light from my wand filled the hall with light. "God, this place has gone to the dogs. Where on earth is that wretched house elf, has he died as well?"

I followed him as he made his way through the house, grunting at the level of mess surrounding us. When we reached the kitchen, which was best summed up by the word filthy, he turned around, met my eyes and gave a short bark of laughter. "Well, now at least, this place fits the name and hearts of the family who has lived here all these years. More than ever."

Shaking my head with a short snort of laughter, I let my eyes roam the room in front of me. It was a strange feeling to see it again now after all these years. It seemed like forever ago that we had spent Christmas dinner at the Blacks. Not a particularly happy memory that was. Grimmauld Place had definitely never been the proper place for a cosy Christmas dinner with its grimy decorations and general air of gloominess.

Usually, all of us had been spending Christmas at James' place but that particular year, the Blacks had insisted on throwing a Christmas bash, inviting a number of selected pure blood wizard families, including the Potters. Sirius himself had been ordered to be present for that occasion, putting him in an exceptionally bad mood, which even the fact that his friends had been attending the party as well, hadn't been able to change. He had spent most of the night scowling at everything and everyone, his expression of disdain only changing when it turned to loathing whenever one of his cousins or his parents approached him.

"Earth to Remus, you still with me?" I shook myself out of my thoughts and glanced at my friend, who was standing by the door and watching me curiously. "Sorry, got a little lost down Memory Lane." Sirius grunted. "Hard not to, isn't it."

With a sigh, I stepped closer to him. "I know this isn't easy for you. Coming back here, I mean. But this house is now yours. And what's more- it's Headquarters to the Order of the Phoenix now. So… let's stop thinking about things we can't change and rather focus on getting all this filth out of here, what do you think? Maybe we'll be able to make this place a little more… habitable."

Sirius gave me a short grin. " Yeah, sure. Shouldn't take us too long now. Maybe about three or four years." The both of us laughed at that when a scuffling sound behind us made us whirl around with our wands at the ready.

"Who dares disturb my mistress' rest? Who are you and what is your business here?" I lowered my wand at the sight of the tattered old house elf standing before us, glaring at us with suspicion in his eyes… even though I thought to have detected a trace of curiosity as well for a moment.

"I do." Sirius stepped forward behind me, pocketing his wand. "So you are alive, Kreacher. I had wondered, seeing the state this house is in."

Kreacher's eyes focused on Sirius and grew wide at the sight of him. "Sirius Black. Can this truly be… the young master has returned?"

Sirius pushed a hand into the untidy curls floating around his still very much haggard face. "Good, you still recognize me. Take a good look at this face, because from now on I will not only be the 'young master' but your only master. I am the last of the Black and I have returned. So I guess that means you'll be serving me from now on." Kreacher continued to stare at him for a moment without giving a reply.

Sirius raised one eyebrow. "Did you hear what I just said? Or have you turned temporarily deaf?" Kreacher uttered a short grunt. "Kreacher heard every word master said. Kreacher only wonders how master happens to be back. The last Kreacher heard master was locked up in Azkaban."

"Oh yes, of course. Of course, you know nothing at all about my escape from Azkaban. My dear mother just happens to have acquired clairvoyant skills now, is that the way of it?"

"Kreacher doesn't know what master is talking about. Kreacher has not left this house for decades." At that, Sirius crouched down, staring the elf hard into the eye. "Listen, Kreacher. I have never been very fond of you, you have always been a foul little creature and I know these feelings are very much reciprocated. But I am the last Black, rightful heir to this house, therefore you will serve me now. Meaning you will not lie to me nor continue to have your little chats with my beloved mother. And neither will you mention my whereabouts or any other information about me or my companion to literally anyone. Are we clear on that?"

Kreacher gave Sirius a curt little nod, accompanied by a look filled with pure loathing. When Sirius got up again and turned around to face Remus, Kreacher departed through the kitchen door, the sound of his low muttering still reaching them. "Master thinks he can just barge in here and have Kreacher lick his shoes. Master is an ungrateful little swine, a blood traitor, he is. Consorting with werewolves, Mudbloods, blood traitors. Master broke his mother's heart, he did."

Sirius barked a short laugh. "My mother had no heart, Kreacher. And if she should indeed have had one, it was made out of stone or iron, so basically impossible to break. And just a little heads up, my ears work just fine, I can hear you." Kreacher did not deign to reply.

"So, you're going to stay here?" Sirius nodded and started to have look in all the cabinets surrounding him. "Yes, I think so. Better than a cave, isn't it? Not by far perhaps, but at least I don't have to live like an animal in here. Besides, Dumbledore wants me to stay here."

He turned around and gave me a quick look. "What about you, Remus? We haven't really had a chance to talk about everything happening after you quit your job at Hogwarts."

I shrugged, crossing the hall to have a look at the living room. "Well, there's not really much to tell. It's public knowledge that I'm a werewolf now, so as you can imagine, the prospect to get a new job is slim to none. And who would willingly let a known werewolf rent their apartment?" Even though I had aimed at a more or less neutral tone, the bitterness lacing my voice was hard to miss. Especially for Sirius.

"I would. And don't you care about them, Remus. Don't you give a shit about what they say about you. They don't know you." I gave my best friend a quick smile, seeing that he had stopped his rummaging and was instead leaning against the wall, looking at me closely.

"Bit hard not to, isn't it?" Sirius sighed and shifted his gaze to the floor. Uttering a bark of laughter, he glanced up at me again. "My, my, how have the mighty fallen… We used to be some of the most popular kids in school, getting along with practically everybody. Except for the Slytherins, but they don't count. And now look at us… the werewolf and the escaped mass murderer. We've really come a long way, haven't we, Remus?"

The smile on his face was partly bitter but for the most part, he really did seem to consider it amusing to some extent. Incredible, Sirius was. Even after having spent twelve years in Azkaban, he still hadn't lost his sense of humour and could even joke about it.

"Well, at least there's still the two of us." Sirius nodded. "Yes. So, when are you going to move in here with me?"

Started I almost dropped the dusty book I had just picked up from the desk in the living room, staring at my friend in confusion. "What on earth are you talking about?"

"You need a place to stay and I need my best friend. We have spent far too much time apart, anyway. So, it's a win-win situation, really. And there are no if and buts about it. I didn't ask you whether you wanted to move in, I simply inquired when you would move in." I shook my head, smiling.

"You're serious? Let me tell you, I don't think your mother would very much appreciate you letting a werewolf move into her precious house. And neither would the rest of your lovely family."

"Damn my mother, damn my family! They're all dead anyway. Besides, the only real family I've ever had were the four of you."

I could feel my throat constricting at these words. The four of us… There had been no four of us for such a long time. There had only been me. Remus Lupin, the one left behind. For the longest time, I had believed two of my closest friends dead, one of them at the hands of the third one, who had turned traitor and betrayed James and Lily to Voldemort and then killed Peter and twelve innocent Muggles when the latter had come after him to challenge him for what he had done. There had only been me left, torn with grief, disbelief and hatred. I had never been able to believe that Sirius would have done something like this, that he would have betrayed his best friends to Voldemort.

Well, as it turned out,he hadn't and it had been Peter, after all. And so suddenly, my whole world had been flipped upside down again. Two of my friends were still alive, the one a runaway traitor and coward, the other had been sitting in Azkaban for twelve years for a crime he had not committed and was now finally standing beside me again, after he had managed to break out of Azkaban. Enough to make anyone's head hurt. Whatever, I was just so glad to have my best friend back and to know him to still be the man I had always believed him to be.

"Earth to Moony? Where did you just go?" Sirius gazed at me curiously. Shaking my head, I gave him a weak smile. "Just glad to have you by my side again, Padfoot."

His lips turned up into a smile as well and he gripped my arm and gave it one hard squeeze. "So am I. More than anything. It used to be the four of us against the world… now I guess it's just Moony and Padfoot against the world, is it?" I huffed a shaky laugh.

"I guess so."

Sirius shook his locks energetically, taking a deep breath. "Alright, enough with the sentimental. Back to business, you'll be moving in, yeah?"

Sighing, I gave him a quizzical look. "Do I even have a choice?"

Sirius shook his head with a broad deviant grin.

"Well, then. Agreed."

The sudden sound of the bell, immediately followed by Walburga Black's screeching made both of us wince and roll our eyes in annoyance.

"You go get the door, I'll shut _her_ up", Sirius growled, his eyes flashing sparks. Not knowing whether to laugh or wince at Mrs Black's screeching, I made my way towards the front door, casting a quick look out of the spy before opening.

"Hello there, Professor!" Two identical mischievous grins were the first thing to great me as Fred and George Weasley both jumped forwards to clasp my hand.

"Fred, George, good to see you. But just call me Remus as I'm unfortunately not your teacher anymore." I smiled at twins affectionately. The two of them were the biggest troublemakers I had ever set my eyes on… well, with the sole exception of us when we were their age.

"Ah, so you are the famous Professor Lupin. We have heard so much about you, Sir." The woman standing behind them, who was obviously Mrs Weasley, as she bore quite a close resemblance to their children, came forwards to shake my hand with a broad smile.

"Mrs Weasley, I take it? Please, just call me Remus."

"Only if you call me Molly."

As I was about to turn to greet the other two people standing next to the Weasleys, a loud bellowing was to be heard.

"Will you finally shut up, you bloody bitch? I've had to listen to your screeching all of my life, you really have to torment me from the grave as well? Shut up, Shut up, SHUT UP!"

"YOU ABOMINATION OF MY FLESH! IS THAT ANY WAY TO TALK TO YOUR MOTHER? GET OUT OF MY HOUSE THIS INSTANT AND TAKE YOUR FILTHY HALFBLOOD FRIEND WITH YOU!"

"This is MY house now, if you like it or not! Because you are DEAD! And I will bloody well bring anyone I like into this house, no matter what their blood status is. And you know why that is? Because I am not a bloody lunatic like you and the rest of my wretched family!"

"YOU UNGRATEFUL LITTLE MONSTER, YOU ARE NO LONGER PART OF THIS FAMILY, HAVEN'T BEEN FOR MORE THAN FIFTEEN YEARS. AND GOOD RIDDANCE, YOU HAVE PUT SHAME UPON US ALL, UPON THE NOBLE-…"

"I spit upon your Noble House of Black. Yes, I am no longer a part of this family, THANK GOD, but I still bear the family name, therefore this house is mine. SO SHUT UP NOW."

"TAKE THAT BACK! TAKE THAT BACK NOW!"

"What? That I spit upon your Noble House of Black? Thought that would please you, you old hag." Sirius' voice had a most unpleasant sneer in it now and I couldn't help wincing at the level of noise they were making.

Turning around with a sheepish expression on my face, I gave everyone an apologetic smile.

"I'm sorry. This was one of the more pleasant surprises this lovely house harbors"

"What? Sirius or the portrait? It is a portrait, I presume?" Mad-Eye Moody gave the entrance hall a suspicious glance before throwing me a wry grin. Chuckling I nodded.

"Yes, it is a portrait and a particularly… difficult one at that, as you can hear. As soon as she hears any noise, she starts screaming and well, we haven't really figured out how to shut up her up permanently. We thought a Sleeping Charm would do, but it does not seem to work this time. Or Sirius just enjoys arguing with her, that's a possibility as well. Why don't you just come in and make yourself at home while I go give Sirius a hand?" With that, I swivelled around and hastily made my way down the hall, as the screaming turned even more vicious.

"What in the world is going on? Why haven't you been able to shut up her up yet?" Sirius whirled around to glare at me, his lips pursed in a ferocious snarl.

"What?" Rolling my eyes and pulling out my wand, I pointed it out at Mrs Black, who was still throwing insults at her son and muttered a Sleeping Charm again, making her fall asleep.

Sirius grumbled as I turned around to face him with my hands on my hips and my eyebrows raised. "Show-off. She kept insulting me."

Just as I was about to reply, a loud crashing noise came from downstairs, followed by a curse. Sirius and I barely had time to look at each other in alarm when Mrs Black's eyes flashed open once again and screeched out loud "BLOODTRAITORS!FILTH!HALFBLOODS! WHAT NOW? WHO HAS THAT BLOODTRAITOR NOW BROUGHT INTO MY HOUSE? SIRIUS BLACK, YOU ABOMINATION OF MY WOMB, IF I WERE ALIVE I WOULD SKIN YOU FOR THIS. HOW DARE YOU, HOW DARE YOU BEFOUL YOUR PARENT'S ANCESTRY? KREACHER! DO SOMETHING!"

"Wow, death so does not suit you, Great Auntie!" Startled at the sudden sound of a female voice behind us, I nearly dropped my wand. As I turned around, I blinked startled at the flash of colour meeting my eyes.

A sudden grin illuminated Sirius' face as he stared at the young woman standing in front of us, her eyes focused on the portrait, grinning unabashedly at Mrs Black. Now that I looked at her more closely, she did seem familiar. No, wait, it couldn't be…

"Oh my… It can't be little Nymphadora?" Her eyes flashed towards him at that but before she could reply, Mrs Black seemed to have found her voice again.

"AND THE NEXT BLOODTRAITOR HAS ARRIVED. THE FREAK! THE FREAK GIVEN BIRTH BY MY BLOODTRAITOR NIECE DARES STEP OVER MY DOORSTEP! AS IF THAT ONE IS NOT ENOUGH FOR ME TO BEAR."

Still grinning, the woman pointed her wand at Mrs Black. "Well, it sure was nice talking to you, Auntie Walburga, but I am afraid your voice is giving me a headache right now, so surely you won't mind if I shut you up now." Pushing past me, she took a few steps closer to the portrait until her face was only inches away from Mrs Blacks, making Sirius shudder in disgust, and stared her right in the eye, her smile still firmly plastered on her face even though her eyes seemed to have turned to steel.

"And just a warning: Never ever dare to talk about my mama like that again! She is a hundred times the woman you were. So, now that we've established that: Nighty night!" She muttered the incantation before Mrs Black even had the chance to reply, grinning in satisfaction as her victim's eyes closed again and she fell asleep with her mouth slightly open.

Then the woman whirled around, making her bright pink curls fly in all directions. "Why hello, Sirius! Yes, indeed I am. But for future references: I go by Tonks now. So please do me a favour and never ever call me that wretched name again or I will have to hurt you." With that, she took a two quick steps and threw her arms around his neck with a laugh.

"It's so good to see you again, cousin. We missed you so much." Sirius raised his eyebrows, grinning down at her and hugging her back tightly.

"Oh really? You missed a convicted murderer who was imprisoned in Azkaban for the killing of a dozen muggles and one fellow wizard? A man, who had supposedly betrayed his best friend and his wife to Voldemort, resulting in their murder?"

"Oh shut up! Momma never really wanted to believe her favourite cousin had turned a murderer and neither did I. I've only ever seen Momma cry twice in my life before… when the news of your imprisonment reached us and when Dumbledore told us that you were innocent. Oh God, don't tell her I told you that or she will absolutely kill me."

"Sweet Andie. How is she?"

The woman stepped back again. "Oh, I nearly forgot. She wanted me to give you a message."

Sirius' eyebrows shot up again. "Well, go ahead."

An evil grin appeared on the woman's face and quick as a snake, she struck Sirius across the face, making him gasp in surprise. Taken aback, he reached up gingerly to touch his cheek while staring at the pink-haired witch in front of him, still grinning like mad. Then she stood up on her tiptoes and gave him a soft peck on the injured cheek. "With love from Momma."

Sirius' eyes jumped up to meet mine, a very comic wide-eyed look of astonishment and confusion in them that finally did it. I burst into laughter.

"Moony, you traitor", Sirius whined with mock-outrage but after a few seconds I could hear his bellowing barks of laughter join mine, as well as the laugh of the girl. I could honestly not remember when I had been laughing this hard for the last time. Probably dated back to the time when James and Lily were still alive.

Finally, our laughter died down again and I was clutching my sides while Sirius was pulling his cousin into his arms again. "Taught you well when you were a kid, haven't I? You seem to have turned into quite a cheeky one."

"You bet! The teachers at Hogwarts loved me!" She grinned at him teasingly.

"Carried on our legacy of mischief-making, did you? Well, tell Andie I say thanks for the message and ask her what the hell that slap was for."

"That slap was for "being an idiot who broke his favourite cousin's heart with his idiocy". That's a quote by the way." Finally, she turned around and gave me a curious look, big brown eyes taking me in closely, flashing in recognition.

"Remus Lupin! My, my, the two of you really did get old."

My eyebrows flashed up. "Well, you still recognized us, so that's something I guess."

Grinning she stepped towards me and held out her hand. "Well, it's good to see you again. I have the fondest memories of you guys coming to visit Momma when I was a kid."

So did I. I was still pretty much frozen in place, once again getting dragged down Memory Lane as I stared at the young woman in front of me. God, it had been such a long time. Trying to ignore the pang of pain in my chest, I bit down onto my bottom lip and gave her my best attempt at a smile.

"Tonks, what are you doing here, anyway?" Sirius slung his arms around her shoulders, leading her down the steps.

"I brought her along."

A bright grin appeared on Sirius' face as he let go of Tonks and jumped down the last two steps to greet Moody, who was waiting at the foot of the stairs, his electric blue glass eye twirling around like mad, trying to take everything around him in.

"You are a ruddy idiot, you know that, right?" His other eye was glaring at Sirius.

"Oh, c'mon Mad Eye, I am sure the lectures can wait until later." Tonks stepped past Mad Eye, patting his shoulder with a wink. "How about we join the rest of the others in the kitchen now?"

Mad-Eye sighed and looked up at us. "She's right. Let's move it."

"Charming as ever" Sirius murmured to me with a grin, making both of us chuckle.

As we followed Tonks and Mad-Eye into the kitchen, Molly Weasley greeted us with bright smile.

"All right, I expect everyone is hungry, am I correct in thinking that?" Her statement was followed by a loud and resounding yes by her twin sons, an enthusiastic nod from Sirius and a growl from Mad-Eye. With a good-natured laugh, she turned her back on us and took inventory of the kitchen.

"I'll help you, Molly." Tonks stepped next to her and reached out to grab the pot Molly had just picked up when the latter twirled around with a bit of a strained smile.

"That's so nice of you, darling but I think I can manage on my own. You've had a long day at the ministry, why don't you sit down and relax a bit?" Before Tonks could reply, Mad-Eye had grabbed her elbow and pulled her with him. "Go sit down before you manage to wreck Sirius' whole kitchen when you've only just arrived."

Tonks scowled. "I was not about to do any such thing."

Mad-Eye grunted. "Not on purpose."

With a huff, the young woman spun around, making her pink curls twirl around her, her hands on her hips and a defiant expression on her face. "And just what do you presume to imply, Mad-Eye?" The latter just grunted again and patted her shoulder as he passed her.

I exchanged a curious glance with Sirius but just as the latter was about to open his mouth and ask Tonks and Mad-Eye what that had been about, the door to the kitchen swung open once again and Dumbledore himself entered the kitchen.

"Well, I am glad to see that most people had been expecting have already arrived. Molly, dear, did you hear anything from Arthur?"

Molly nodded, putting down the spatula she had been wielding. "Yes, he should be here any minute, Albus. Are you hungry, I was just about to whip up some food?"

"Well, yes, that would be lovely. It's always distinctly unpleasant to talk about heavy matters on an empty stomach. Well, hello everyone."

Dumbledore stepped towards Sirius and me with a warm smile and the usual twinkle in his blue eyes behind his glasses. "Sirius, Remus. I trust you are fine?"

Sirius cast a dark look around the room. "As fine as I can be, being back here." The bitterness in his voice was obvious and most of the people present looked up and glanced at him in question. He did not seem to notice, though, too caught up in unpleasant old memories, I suppose. Trying to snap him out of it, I cleared my throat and elbowed him gently in the side. Startled, Sirius glanced at me and then at the rest of the room.

"Oh, dear. Sorry, where are my manners. Hello everyone and welcome to my lovely home." The last three word were heavily laced with sarcasm and once again, he cast a dark look around the room. Then, he briefly shook his head and fixed a bright smile on his face.

"Well, we'll just have to make the best of it, won't we? So, you must be the Weasley twins. Fred and George, am I correct? Harry has told me quite a lot about you." With his hand outstretched, he stepped forward to greet the twins, who were both beaming at him. In the very last second, though, before Fred could grasp his outstretched hand, he pulled it back and gave the boy a suspicious look.

Immediately, Fred's broad smile was replaced by a look of innocence as Sirius' gaze travelled over him musingly. "I know that look. I've seen it on my face plenty of times when I was young. You are up to something, aren't you?"

Fred blinked up at him, his face positively blank. "Me? Up to something? No, why would you think that?"

Sirius snorted. "Yeah, right. Let me tell you something, Mr Weasley. This kind of thing is not going to work on me. Never forget that it was the four of us, who fabricated the map you've had in your possession for several years. Never forget that it was the four of us, who were your successors as pranksters at Hogwarts. And never ever try to fool me because it won't work. And I wrote the book on the innocent puppy dog- eye, so spare yourself the effort."

Fred exchanged a look with George and as they turned back around, they were sporting identical beaming grins. "I think I might like you." Fred gave Sirius a salute, which the latter imitated with a grin of his own.

"I think I might just like you, too. From all I've heard, you've done a great job of following in our footsteps. Well done, gentlemen."

I rolled my eyes, leaning back against the wall with a smile. As I looked up again, my gaze caught Tonks's, who was watching me avidly. As I had never been very comfortable with attention and did not like being stared at, I quickly looked away and focused on Fred and George again, who were now shaking hands with Sirius. Hm… introducing those three to each another should certainly prove interesting. The twins were quite a handful as it was but adding Sirius to the mix…

Dumbledore seemed to be thinking something along those lines as well, as he was fighting a grin as his eyes met mine. "Remus, how are you?" Clasping my hand with his, he gave me a warm smile. As always, he gave me the impression that his bright periwinkle blue eyes were able to see much more than others did, of seeing right through me, through all the pretences and all the walls I had erected around me.

"I'm fine, Albus, thanks. Yourself?"

"Well, same old, same old. Voldemort on the rise again certainly makes for an interesting pastime." Dumbledore chuckled, even though his eyes had darkened slightly at these words.

"I imagine." My dry reply made my former headmaster smile at me with a distinct expression of fondness on his face, giving my hand an encouraging squeeze again before turning around to look at the rest of the people present.

"Hello there, Alastor. I see you have already brought another recruit into our midst. Hello, Nymphadora, long time no see. I've heard you're an Auror, now? Well done. Well done, indeed."

The little pink-haired witch smiled up at him cheekily as she stepped forward to shake Dumbledore's hand. "Yes, indeed. Hello, Professor, good to see you again."

"I'm not your headmaster anymore, dear. You may call me Albus."

"May I ask you a favour then, Albus? Would you be so kind as to call me Tonks?"

Another chuckle. "Ah, yes, I forgot. All right, then, Tonks. You don't seem to have changed a lot in the years I haven't seen you. Still objecting to be called your given name, still cheerful, still sporting electric colour hair – "

" – still unable to walk a few steps on a flat surface without tripping." Moody interrupted Dumbledore, casting a glare in the direction of Tonks. She tossed her hair and huffed in indignation.

"Hey, I might be clumsy but at least I have a few character traits considered important for a human being which you are seriously lacking, Mad-Eye! Pleasantness, for a start!"

"Pleasantness is overrated. And now shut your trap, girl."

"Shut up, yourself."

My eyebrows nearly hit my hairline and I exchanged a baffled look with Sirius, who looked just as taken aback as I probably did. I had never heard anyone dare to speak to notorious ex-Auror and ex- Head of the Auror Department in that way. Alastor –Mad-Eye – Moody was a warrior of quite some renown, but as Tonks had said, he was not exactly known for his pleasantness. He intimidated most people, or even scared them, as he tended to be rather gruff and direct. Due to his job and the things he had encountered during the First War, he had also become known for an ever increasing level of paranoia, which had finally compelled the Ministry into making him retire a few years back even though Moody was still more than capable of doing his job. Plus, he had always been rather out-spoken and with the years, his displeasure with the Ministry's methods had become more and more pronounced.

Well, even if most people tended to be intimidated by Moody, the young woman certainly wasn't. Her hands were still on her hips and her eyes were firmly locked on Moody's one beady dark as well as on his electric blue artificial eye, which was always spinning madly in his eye socket, as the two of them engaged in a stare-off.

I couldn't help but feel impressed with the young woman. I had never seen anyone except for Dumbledore and Minerva McGonagall talk back to Moody, let alone insult him.

With a grunt, Moody finally shook his head and gave Tonk's shoulder a good-natured shove. "You'd better sit down before I decide to kick your arse."

Huffing, she grinned at him. "You're welcome to try, Mad-Eye. I can't promise you'll succeed, though. You trained me well."

"I certainly did." There was a distinct sound of pride in Moody's voice as his lips actually pulled into a bit of a smile as he looked at her.

Sirius seemed to be just as fascinated by the exchange as I was, mouthing a "What the hell" in my direction with wide eyes and an impressed look on his face. I just shrugged, feeling in awe myself. I was not exactly scared of Moody but nevertheless... I was rather attached to my body parts so I would not dare to get on his bad side.

As we all settled down onto the table, Dumbledore cleared his throat. "As all of you are already aware of why you are here today, I will make it very brief. Yes, the rumours are true. Voldemort, or You Know Who, as most people prefer to call him, is at large again, having killed one of my students and fought Harry Potter on the day of the last task of the Triwizard Tournament. I have tried to get the Minister to acknowledge this fact right after this dreadful incident but unfortunately, he, as well as the majority of the wizarding community, refuses to believe this. Except for us and a few others, who will join us for our first meeting tomorrow evening. For the first meeting of the Order of the Phoenix since the end of the First War. Most of the people, who will be joining us there, were also members of the original Order of the Phoenix, during the first War. There are a few among us here as well, who were or who were affiliated with it even though they did not partake in the fighting itself. Fortunately though, it is not only the old lot, we have a few new recruits as well. Nymphadora – pardon me, old habits die slow – Tonks, for one. Sirius has been so kind to provide this house as Headquarters for us, therefore, all future meetings will be held here."

While Dumbledore spoke about his efforts to convince the rest of the wizarding community that Voldemort was indeed very much alive and at large again, my thoughts drifted off. I could remember just fine, when it had been the original Order of the Phoenix crowded around Dumbledore, listening to his every word. I could see James' face as clearly as if it had been yesterday, staring at Dumbledore, a determined look on his face, determined to fight Voldemort, determined not to let anyone see that he was scared. And Lily, sweet Lily, who had been right there, at his side, trying to keep an optimistic smile on her face, trying to hold onto her belief that everything would turn out fine, that she would get her happy ending.

Peter, right next to me, chewing on his bottom lip, as twitchy and nervous as always but trying to copy James' determined demeanour. Sirius, right there at James' right hand side with a confident grin on his face, as always, even though it didn't really seem to reach his eyes, which had a grave, haunted look in them, if you took the trouble to take a closer look and look past his boisterous attitude. And me, silent, grave, trying to cling to any shred of hope I could find.

We had lost half of the original order during the First War, Edgar Bones, one of the most able fighters I had ever seen; Benji Fenwick and the Prewett brothers, who had still managed to crack jokes and make everyone laugh even during the darkest of times; my classmates – witty, brave Marlene McKinnon and her best friend Dorcas Meadow, who had made all of us crack up quite a few times when her witty, sarcastic self managed to slip past her silent demeanour… and of course, James and Lily Potter. My best friends.

A sudden squeeze of my hand brought me back to the present. Startled at the burning feeling in my eyes, I turned my head to meet Sirius' gaze next to me. The look in his eyes, which were glistening suspiciously as well, told me all I need to know. He had been thinking the very same thing I had. Without saying a word, I squeezed back, closing my eyes for a moment to fight back the tears that were threating to escape. Yes, I had lost James and Lily. But at least, I had Sirius back. For years, for more than a century actually, I had been forced to believe that it had been Sirius, who was responsible for our best friends' murder. That it had been Sirius, who had betrayed Lily and James to the Dark Lord. That it had been Sirius, who had cold-bloodedly murdered Peter and a number of Muggles when Peter had supposedly tried to confront him. While Sirius had been locked up in Azkaban, I had been all alone, believing three of my friends to be dead and one of them, the one I had always been closest to, a traitor responsible for their death's.

I had never been able to fully wrap my head around it, as the Sirius I had known would never have been capable of such a thing. The Sirius I had known would have moved mountains for the people he loved, would have died for his friends. He had had more reason than any of us to hate the Dark Arts as well as Voldemort and the ones who followed him. Part of me had always refused to believe that Sirius had betrayed us. And as it turned out that part of me had been right.

At least I had Sirius back. I was not alone anymore. The thought of Lily and James' death might still tear me apart but at least I had someone to share my grief with, someone who I knew missed them just as much as I did.

Finally, I took a deep breath and opened my eyes again, blinking a couple of times. My eyes were still burning a little but I was positive that the threat of crying in front of everyone had passed. As I looked up, my eyes once again met a couple of dark brown eyes, staring back at me.


	2. Chapter 2

_Will you recognize me_

 _Call me name or walk on by_

 _Rain keeps falling_

 _Rain keeps falling_

 _Down, down, down_

 _Simple Minds - Don't You (Forget About Me)_

Tonks:

He intrigued me. I had nearly forgotten how much I used to care about this man… before. Before everything went to hell, before Sirius had been shipped off to Azkaban.

As I was a child, Sirius had often paid my mother a visit, bringing his three friends with him. I could not remember everything, as I had been very young at that time. The last time I had seen the lot of them, I must have been seven years old.

But I did remember the four of them: Sirius, James, Remus and Peter. Inseparable, the four of them, my mother always used to say. Loud, cheeky Sirius Black; confident, daring James Potter, nervous, twitchy Peter Pettigrew and silent, serious Remus Lupin.

Actually, I mostly remembered Sirius and Remus, as they had actually been the ones to interact with me. Whereas Peter did not really seem to be that fond of children and had steered clear off me most of the time he had been there, James had indeed always been nice to me and sometimes even played a game or two with me, but mostly he had spent his time at our place talking to my parents. Sirius, though, had been genuinely fond of me, always bringing me something along and giving me piggy back rides through our house and swinging me through the air in his arms until Mum hollered at him to stop as he would manage to make me sick to my stomach.

But most of all… I remembered Remus. While at some time or other, all of his friends had settled down at the kitchen table to eat or talk the whole You Know Who business over with my parents, he had always been the one to keep me company, to play with me or to simply let me crawl onto his lap and sleep while the adults were talking.

Whereas Sirius had always managed to make me laugh with his playful demeanour, his contagious laugh and teasing winks, Remus had always managed to make me safe. He had always been rather quiet, I could not remember him raising his voice once in my presence, whereas I could recall a fair few times where James and Sirius had been shouting their heads off. Remus, though, had always just sat there, resting his hand on his chin and rolling his eyes, while smiling fondly at his friends.

I could still remember one evening in particular _. Andromeda had told me in the morning that Uncle Sirius and his friends would drop by for lunch. As I had always loved those visits of theirs, I had been on tenterhooks, waiting for them to arrive. Time passed and passed and as noon turned into mid-afternoon, I had realized, even as a child that my mother was growing more and more restless, starting to feel anxious myself. I knew that Sirius and his friends were part of some alliance to fight You Know Who, a dark wizard who was causing havoc all over the country. I was not aware of any details but I did know that there was a war._

 _Mum had tried to uphold a cheerful exterior for my sake but I had seen her frequent glances at the clock and registered the fact that she was chewing her lip nervously. Mid-afternoon turned into evening and by the time of the sunset, I myself was close to tears, fearing that something terrible had happened._

 _Finally, at seven p.m, when Mum had just been about to try to force me to go to bad, there had been the knock on the door we had been waiting for. She had jumped up as if electrocuted and full out run to the door, jerking it open and uttering a brief cry of relief at the sight of Sirius' face._

" _Oh, thank God! Thank God, I've been so worried… What happened?" I did not know why at first but the joy I had felt at the sound of the knock was replaced by a feeling of dread at the sudden tone in her voice. She sounded scared._

" _Can we come in? I'm sorry it's so late." Sirius had stepped into the room, his eyes falling on me. His lips pulled up into a smile, but it turned out a lot weaker than I had ever seen it. I had never seen Sirius look so terrible, there were shadows beneath his eyes, and three deep long red scratches on his cheek._

" _Hi there, Dora. How's my little sweetheart?" I jumped up and raced straight into his outstretched arms. Just like always, Sirius slung his arms around me, got back to his feet and twirled me in a circle through the air while I laughed and shrieked in delight, forgetting for just a moment._

 _But it was over far too quickly, as Sirius set me down again, crouched down to my level and gave me another smile as he pushed a strand of my violet hair out of my face. "Shouldn't you be in bed by now?"_

" _Mummy told me you'd come today. I've been waiting for you." His smile grew a bit broader at that._

" _You really are a sweetheart. But now, you should really go up to bed, Dora. Go on, I promise I'll come up later to tell you goodbye. I'm sorry we are so late, we got hold up. I'll have more time for you the next time, we pay you a visit, all right?" Feeling dejected, I pouted a little. Sirius grinned and pinched my cheek playfully. "Watch out, Dora. If the wind turns, you might just end up stuck like that forever and I'd never be able to see your beautiful smile again. Won't you give me a smile? Just a little one?" As I smiled up at him, he gave me a brief hug and then gently pushed me in the direction of the staircase, as he got back to his feet. "Go on up now. We really need to talk to your Mum and you really need to get some sleep, little princess." As he turned towards my Mum, my gaze fell onto the three of his friends. There were all looking just as bad as he did, tired and sad, somehow. James gave me a pat on the shoulder and a smile, which came out a little forced as he passed me, whereas Peter only gave me a little nod. Remus briefly squeezed my shoulder and ruffled my hair gently as a greeting, smiling down at me._

" _You heard your Uncle Sirius. Time for bed, Dora!" Mum sounded weird as she shooed me up the staircase._

 _I got ready for bed with a weird, sunken feeling in my stomach. Something was wrong. Very wrong. I could feel it._

 _As I crawled into bed, I grabbed the teddy bear Sirius and his friends had given me for my third birthday, clutching it tightly to my chest, when a soft knock on the door made me look up._

" _Can I come in?" I smiled at the sight of Remus standing in my doorway and nodded. With a sigh, he sat down on the edge of my bed and smiled at the sight of the teddy._

" _Remus?"_

" _Yes?" His gaze moved up to meet mine._

" _What's the matter?" His eyebrows raised slightly._

" _I know something's wrong. Mummy and Sirius were acting all funny."_

 _There was a brief moment of silence, where Remus hesitated, looking down at his hands. Then finally, he looked up again, meeting my inquiring gaze._

" _You are right. Say Dora, you know about You Know Who and the war that is going on, don't you?" At my nod, he reached and took my hand in his own, squeezing it gently._

" _Well, I'm guessing you know as well, that Sirius, me and the others are actually fighting You Know Who. Sometimes our fight goes well and sometimes… it doesn't. There are good days and then… there are bad days. And then there are days which are just… terrible." He seemed to have a hard time choosing his words. Dropping his gaze again to stare at his hands, he sighed, rubbing his free hand over his face._

" _Today was such a day. We would have been here at lunch but then things happened… things we didn't expect." He took a deep breath, biting down onto his bottom lip._

" _What things?"_

" _You know… in a war, people get hurt at times. On both sides, the good as well as the bad. And today, it was one of our friends that got… hurt." Remus briefly closed his eyes, sighing again, a look I had never seen on him crossing his face. As I gently squeezed his hand, his eyes flew open again and he gave me a sad smile._

" _Will your friend be ok?"_

 _I didn't know if it was a trick of the light but for a moment I thought I had seen tears shimmering in Remus' brown eyes. He bit down onto his lip again._

" _Let's not talk about this, Dora. I do not want to lie to you."_

" _Then don't."_

 _He huffed a brief laugh, smiling indulgently at me. "Oh darling. You are too brave for your own good. But for now, let it go, all right? You are young, you ought not to trouble yourself with the problems of adults. Andromeda would probably be after my blood if she knew that I even told you this much."_

 _As I didn't know what to say, we sat there in silence for a few moments, Remus gently drawing a pattern onto my hand with his thumb, staring into space._

" _Promise me you won't get hurt. Nor Sirius or any of the others." Startled, Remus' gaze flew up to meet mine and once again, I thought I saw a hint of tears in his eyes._

" _Oh, Dora."_

" _Promise me! You can't get hurt. You are one of the good guys!"_

 _Remus closed his eyes once again, a tight smile on his face, one of his hands balling into a fist._

" _I probably shouldn't tell you this but Dora, in war it does not matter sometimes if you are good or bad. My friend was a good person. Nevertheless, she got hurt. I wish I could promise you that nothing bad will happen to any of us but like I told you a few minutes before, I don't want to lie to you."_

 _At these words, I could feel my eyes start to burn. As I kept silent, Remus gave me a searching look, startling as he saw a tear running over my cheek._

" _Oh no, Dora, please don't cry! C'mere, darling." With these words, he drew me against his chest, gently cradling me in his arms and rubbing my back soothingly._

" _I should never have told you any of that. I'm sorry."_

" _No. I am glad you did. Momma never tells me anything. I hate it. I can tell that she is scared, I can tell that Daddy is scared, but they won't tell me. Daddy sometimes acts as if he wants to say something but Momma always stops him. I hate it, Remus. I want to know what is going on. I was so scared today, that something had happened to you. Why won't anybody tell me what's going on?"_

" _Trust me, sweetheart. You know enough. Sometimes it really is a blessing not to know too much about something. Knowledge can be a blessing, but it can also be a burden, you know, it can have the power to hurt you, to torment you… to drive you mad. So please Dora, do not ask me anymore. Someday, you'll understand, I promise you."_

 _Sniffling, I nodded against his chest, feeling his lips press a soft kiss on my head. When I had calmed down again, I lay back down and curled up next to Remus, who was sitting beside me, gently stroking my hair._

" _Why violet?" His sudden question made me look up at him?_

" _What?"_

" _I've been wondering about that you know. Do you wake up in the morning and just feel like having violent hair today or do you have a specific reason for choosing a particular colour?"_

 _I shrugged. "I don't know, actually. I guess most of the time, I really do pick a colour at will. But sometimes, I don't. Like when I'm angry, my hair turns red." Remus nodded, he had seen that happen quite a few times._

" _And when I'm happy, my hair is a bright colour, like pink or blond or something. Sometimes I opt for a mixture, something that is not entirely dark but not light either, like today. And when I'm really upset, my hair is mostly its natural colour, brown."_

" _Do you have a favourite? Like, a colour you like the most?"_

 _I nodded. "Yes, I think I like the pink best." At my answer, his lips pulled up into a smile. "So do I. You look beautiful all the time, but I really like the pink." His gaze wandered away from me and out of the window, staring at the sky as his smile disappeared again, replaced by graveness._

" _Remus." I gently pulled on his sleeve to make him look at me again. As he turned his head to comply and his eyes met mine once more, I gave him a smile, then closed my eyes and scrunched up my face in concentration._

 _As I opened them once more, the smile was once more on Remus' face as he gently ran a hair through my now pink locks._

" _Ah, there you are. We need to get going." Both of us looked up to see Sirius standing at the door. Giving me a smile, he quickly stepped towards the bed and engulfed me in a hug, holding me a tad longer than usual. "We have to leave now. I'm sorry, Dora. I promise, I'll have more time for you next time. Take care, all right." As he pulled back and smiled down at me, I saw a look in his eyes, which I had never seen and couldn't really place. Then he quickly pressed a kiss to my cheek and then ruffled up my hair. "I love you, Dora. Don't ever forget that. Goodnight." Exchanging a glance with Remus, he got back to his feet and then gave me another smile._

" _I'll see you soon, Dora."_

" _Bye, Sirius." As he was already halfway out of the door again, I called after him. "Sirius?"_

 _He came to a halt and turned back around. "Yes, sweetheart?"_

" _Promise me you won't get hurt." Sirius stared at me for a moment and then his eyes briefly jumped to Remus' and then back down to mine. With a sigh, he stepped back into the room and crouched down in front of my bed again._

" _I won't. I'll be back soon. I promise." He gently squeezed my hand and gave me another kiss on the cheek._

" _I love you, too." He smiled at that and this time, he did leave._

 _Remus stayed for another moment, staring after him. Then he sighed and turned his head to look at me. "I guess I have to get going to."_

" _You look tired."_

" _I am. But unfortunately, there is still work to be done."_

" _You can't work when you're tired." He smiled at that._

" _There are more important things than sleep, Dora. Don't worry about me, I'll be fine." He bent down and grabbed the rucksack he had placed onto my dresser when he had come into the room and rummaged around in it._

" _Here. This is for you. I will have to work quite a lot over the next two months and as part of that, I might have to go abroad so I don't know whether I will be back for your birthday. So, consider this an early birthday present." He pressed something into my hand._

 _Curious, I looked down and my eyes found a necklace. It was a small trinket, in the form of a lucky charm. "It's a talisman. If you believe in it, it will protect you and bring you luck. Something we all need these days."_

 _I stared at the necklace for a few seconds and then held it out to him. "But if it's for luck and protection, then you need it way more than I do. You're out there fighting."_

 _Remus shook his head with a smile. "No, I want you to have it."_

 _I hesitated for a moment and then scrambled out of bed._

" _Dora, what are you doing?" Remus gave me a questioning look as I rummaged in drawer of mine. My fingers finally closed on what I had been looking for and as I flopped back down onto the bed next to him, I grabbed his hand and pressed it into his hand._

 _Surprised, Remus looked down at the stone in my hand. "What is this?"_

" _I found it at a place in the woods in Scotland a few years back, near an old stone circle. Daddy said that it would bring me luck. It's yours now."_

 _Remus started down at the stone and then looked up at me again, opening his mouth to say something but I shook my head stubbornly. "I'll only keep the necklace, if you keep the stone."_

" _REMUS! WE REALLY NEED TO GO!" We both startled at Sirius' voice bellowing up from downstairs._

 _Remus sighed and then nodded. "All right. Thank you. I promise, I will keep the stone on me. At all times."_

" _I will do the same." He smiled and then leaned forwards and hugged me. I could feel tears welling in my eyes again. "I don't want you to get hurt." My voice was barely audible as I whispered these words and I could feel Remus' body go tense. "Take care, Dora."_

 _He pressed a kiss onto my hair and then pulled back, smiling at me. Once again, his eyes were glittering. As he got up, he reached out a hand and softly stroked my cheek before pulling a strand of my hair back. "I really like the pink."_

 _With that, he turned around and walked to the door. Before he closed it, he halted for another second and gave me last smile. "Goodbye, Dora sweetheart. Sweet Dreams."_

" _See you soon, Remus. Be safe, please."_

" _I'll try. Bye, baby girl."_

 _I kept waiting for their next visit but they never came. My birthday passed, and still… there was no word of any of them except for a birthday card. But they never came._

 _I kept waiting and waiting for months. Until finally, roughly six months later, I came down into the kitchen in the morning to find my parents seated at the table with white faces, staring into nothingness. When I asked what was wrong, they lied to me and told me that nothing was the matter, that everything was fine but I didn't believe them. A couple of hours later, Daddy came to see me and told me that the bad wizard they had all been fighting against, this You Know Who, had apparently been defeated. When I asked him if that wasn't good news, he had smiled sadly at me and told me that it had been at a great cost, but did not want to elaborate as he said he didn't know any details yet. All he had heard was rumours._

 _The next morning, a terrible scream echoing through the house woke me up. Throwing back my covers, I ran down into the kitchen, stumbling a few times on the way and nearly falling down the staircase, to find my father kneeling on the ground, holding my sobbing mother in his arms. They didn't notice me a for a few moments since my mother's wails were so loud. I had never ever seen my mother cry before. It scared me more than anything else I had ever seen before._

 _Finally, I must have made a sound since Daddy looked up and saw me, his eyes widening. I could see that they were red as well, he must have been crying, too._

" _Daddy, what's going on? Why is Momma crying?" My eyes widened. "Did something happen to Sirius?" My voice was barely audible and shaking so badly that I was actually surprised that Daddy had been able to understand what I was saying. At the mention of Sirius, Momma was starting to cry even harder._

 _Dad closed his eyes for a moment and then bent down to pull Momma up into his arms and he carried her over to the sofa and then looked up at me, patting the space next to him for me to sit down. As I did, his eyes met mine._

" _Dora, sweetheart. There is something I have to tell you. James and his wife Lily… they died two nights ago. You Know Who killed them." I felt like I had been punched. James… cheeky, laughing James dead? And his wife, Lily? I had only met Lily a couple of times but I had really liked her. She had been either smiling or laughing the whole time, cradling her baby in her arms. The baby… what about him? And then my heart clenched… Sirius, what about Sirius? And Remus? And Peter?_

" _Sirius and Remus…." I couldn't finish my question, hoping my Dad would understand what I was asking. He did. Andromeda gave a loud sob at that and Daddy reached over to squeeze her hand._

" _Dora, darling. I hate that I have to tell you this but… Sirius was arrested last night. He is in Azkaban."_

 _My whole world seemed to stop. I didn't comprehend what my Dad was saying. Sirius arrested?_

" _But why?" My voice was barely a whisper and I could feel myself start to shake. Daddy reached out and grabbed my hand, looking into my eyes._

" _He was sentenced to a life sentence in Azkaban for the murder of a dozen of Muggles and one wizard. Not just a random wizard, though. He killed Peter. His friend, Peter Pettigrew."_

 _I couldn't breathe. I couldn't think. No, no! No way. Sirius, sweet caring Sirius was not a murderer. Never._

 _I started to shake my head. "No. No way."_

" _Dora, I am afraid that is not all." My head snapped up to look at my father. He sighed and closed his eyes for another moment, as if gathering all the strength he had to say what it is he meant to say._

" _The murder of Peter Pettigrew and the Muggles are not the only ones he is responsible for. The Order of the Phoenix has suspected for quite some time that there was a traitor among their ranks. Turns out it was Sirius. Long story short: You Know Who was after the Potters for some reason, after Lily and James. They had to go into hiding, with Sirius the only one who knew where they were. And he betrayed their whereabouts to You Know Who, resulting in their murder."_

 _I kept shaking my head. No. No_

" _No. NO. NOOOO!" I jumped up, shaking my head wildly. Daddy reached out for me, trying to take my hand but I took a few steps back. "Sirius is not a murderer. He would never hurt his friends, he loves them. He loves them, he would never do something like this. He is a good person, he wouldn't… he wouldn't…." I trailed off, starting to sob as well._

 _Daddy got up and tried to pull me into his arms but I fought him off and raced up the staircase, nearly blind with tears. Stumbling, I scraped my knee on one of the steps but I simply got up again and kept running until I reached my room. Sobbing, I fell down onto my bed and buried my face in the pillow, reaching my hands up to wrap them around the necklace I had worn around the neck ever since Remus had given it to me. I had never taken it off, not even for one minute._

 _I don't know for how many hours I lay there, crying and holding onto the necklace, as if it was an anchor, the only thing that still kept me grounded._

 _Knowledge can be a blessing, but it can also be a burden, you know, it can have the power to hurt you, to torment you… to drive you mad. So please Dora, do not ask me anymore. Someday, you'll understand, I promise you._

 _Remus' words kept ringing in my head that very night and many nights after it. Someday came a lot sooner than I had expected and yes, now I perfectly understood what he had meant that day._

 _Time passed, year after year, but the pain remained. They had never come back. James and Peter were both dead, Sirius in Azkaban and Remus… Remus never came back. Nobody knew where he had gone, he had simply disappeared. I had never seen any of them again but night after night, I fell asleep with the teddy bear they had given me in my arms and to this day, I had never taken my necklace off. And I never would._


	3. Chapter 3

_Tonks:_

Two days ago:

Scuffling through a stack of papers, I finally sighed in defeat and threw them down onto the table, grabbing my cup of coffee instead and taking a long gulp. It was no use trying to work before I had had my coffee, I would only muck it up anyway.

A knock on the door made me look up, my lips immediately spreading into a smile at the sight of the man standing there.

"Well, well, look who it is. Hey there, Mad-Eye! How's my big fierce mentor?"

Moody simply rolled his eyes at me as he strode into my office and flopped down onto the chair opposite me. "It is beyond me how you can be so awfully cheerful this early in the morning. And how on earth are you able to work in an office this messy?" He cast a disdainful look around the cubicle. It was not messy per se, maybe a little cluttered but I liked it that way.

"It's not messy… it's got character." That earned me a smile.

"Sounds like your describing yourself."

I rolled my eyes and poked my tongue out at him. "Haha, very funny, Mad-Eye. It's good to see you, too. Now, since you rarely do anything without a purpose, I'm guessing there is more to this visit than the sudden urge to see your protégé and insult her housekeeping skills. So what's up?"

That actually managed to make him crack another smile, quite an achievement since Mad-Eye was not a morning person, tending to be even crabbier than usual.

"Right to the point, as always. Good girl."

"Yep, you've taught me well."

Mad-Eye sighed and then looked up at me. "I could ease you into the topic by making small-talk but as – "

" – but as you don't know how to do small-talk, you're just going to skip this part and get right to it. Fine with me, Mad-Eye. Spring it on me. You're actually scaring me a little right now, since normally you would just have blurted out whatever it is once before even saying hello. So, out with it."

"I know where Sirius Black is." I froze, my coffee cup halfway to my mouth.

"You what?" Incredulous, I stared at my mentor and friend. "Then why on earth are you here in my office instead of Shacklebolts?"

"Because I have no intention whatsoever of turning him in." My jaw dropped even further. I set my cup down onto the table and then ran my hands through my hair while trying to get my thoughts to align. Trying to make sense to what Mad-Eye was saying.

"Mad-Eye. You'd better explain yourself because right now, I am little confused. That's putting it mildly, actually. But right now, I'm trying to keep my calm here, so you'd better start explaining any minute now, before I lose it and run to fetch Shacklebolt. You ought to know that Sirius Black is a very sensitive topic for me, so – "

Mad-Eye leaned forward across the table a bit, grabbed my chin and raised it gently to make me look at him instead of the table top I had been fixing in my attempt to stay calm.

"If you'd stop rambling for a moment, I'll explain. But I think it would be better to discuss this somewhere else, don't you? How about we grab some lunch later and I promise I'll explain everything. Just don't do anything rash, all right? I trusted you with this information and I trust that you will keep it quiet at least until you hear my explanation. All you need to know for now is that I am aware of his current whereabouts and that everything is not as it seems. Sirius Black is innocent and I trust him."

I simply stared back into his mismatched eyes, feeling at a loss for words. Sirius, innocent? What? Both my head and stomach felt like I'd just been on a rollercoaster.

"And… you couldn't have told me this over lunch instead of springing it on me right now?"

"No. Because you would have kept bugging me about it and besides, so you can already get used to the idea of Black being innocent and it will save us precious time later, in which I can explain everything. So, see you later. Noon all right with you?"

Suffice it to say, I had not gotten much work done that particular morning.

When I arrived at the restaurant Mad-Eye and I usually went to, he was already there at a table right at the back of the restaurant. Watching me make my way over to him, he settled back and crossed his arms over his chest.

"Did the shock wear off yet?"

I flopped down onto the chair opposite him and closed my eyes for a moment before looking at him. "Not really, no."

He just grunted and then leaned forwards. "Ready to hear my explanation?"

Without another word, I motioned for him to go ahead, smoothing my hair back behind my ear.

"All right, I trust you are more than familiar with the circumstances of Black's conviction. Well, recent events have revealed that everything is not as it seems. So, when Black escaped last year, everyone thought that he'd be after Harry Potter. Turns out, this suspicions were true. But unlike people believed, it was not to kill Potter. It was to protect him."

My eyebrows shot up and I opened my mouth to say something but was cut off by an abrupt gesture. "Don't interrupt me, just listen. You can ask questions later. So, Black wanted to protect Potter. He trailed him to Hogwarts and was there all during the last school year, in the disguise of a dog. See, Black is an illegal animagus that is how he managed to escape from Azkaban in the first place. Then at the end of the school year, there was a showdown, involving Black, the Potter boy and his friends and an old friend of Black's, who spent the last year teaching as Defence against the Dark Arts professor at Hogwarts, Remus Lupin."

I could feel a wave of shock at hearing that name coursing through me, my mouth dropping open once again. I had not heard Remus' name or any mention of for at least a century. He had simply disappeared. He had been teaching at Hogwarts for the last year? Mad-Eye didn't seem to have registered my surprise as he continued without stopping.

"And there was someone else involved. Peter Pettigrew, the wizard Black is supposed to have killed. No, don't you dare interrupt me, as I said you can ask questions later. So, as it turns out: Pettigrew is very much alive. Just like Black, he is an illegal animagus and has been hiding in the form of a rat in the keeping of the Weasley family for all these years. Their youngest son happens to be Potter's best friend, so Pettigrew was right there with the Potter boy all these years. And not only is Pettigrew alive… he's the one responsible for the Muggle killing Black was imprisoned for as well as for the deaths of Lily and James Potter. Pettigrew, not Black, had been the traitor. Last year, Fudge paid a visit to Azkaban and took a look at the prisoners. When Black asked him if he could have the newspaper Fudge had with him, he gave it to him. On the front of the newspaper, there had been a picture of the Weasley family. Arthur Weasley, I believe you might know him, he works at the ministry as well, had gotten a price and so there had been an article about him, the details are not important here. But this is, the picture had showed the whole Weasley family and on the shoulder of the youngest boy, Ron, there had been his pet rat. A pet rat, whose paw clearly showed to be missing a toe."

Mad-Eye looked at me intently, checking to see if I understood. And I did. "All that was left of Pettigrew was… a finger…"

Mad-Eye nodded. "Indeed. Black was aware of this fact as well and as he had seen his former friend transform in the past, he recognized him immediately. He also grasped that the Weasley boy was old enough to be at Hogwarts, just like Harry Potter. He realized what this meant and well… I suppose the rest is pretty clear. Black escaped and watched over Potter in his disguise, waiting for a chance to get his hands on Pettigrew. At the end of the year, he finally had his chance and seized it. Once again, details are not important. All you need to know is this: Black convinced the children as well as Lupin of his innocence and together they managed to transform Pettigrew back to his human form. But due to an unfortunate sequence of events, Pettigrew managed to escape, Black was caught and would nearly have had the Dementor's kiss performed on him if Potter had not managed to save him and help him escape with a little help from Dumbledore. Oh, yes, I should probably add this, Dumbledore had a little talk with Black beforehand and he believes him. But unfortunately no one else did. Who'd believe the tale of a couple of thirteen year olds and an old friend of Black's? So ever since then, Black has been on the run, keeping contact with Potter and Dumbledore, though."

Mad-Eye stopped talking for a moment as he had spotted the waitress approaching our table. After we had placed our order, his eyes raised to meet mine again. "All right, girl? Keeping up with me so far?"

I took a deep breath and then blew it out through puffed cheeks. "Honestly? I don't know."

"Well, there's more." My head snapped up to stare at him. His eyes were focused on mine, even his electric blue one, which was normally spinning around in all directions so fast that it often managed to make me sick.

"There's more? What is it?"

"I suppose you have heard the rumours about what happened at the day of the last task of the Triwizard Tournament and about Dumbledore claiming You Know Who is alive and on the rise again?"

I nodded. I had a feeling where this was going and I didn't like it.

"It's true, baby girl. It's all true. I want you to know that I believe Dumbledore. I believe every word he says. For all it's worth, I am convinced that Sirius Black is innocent and that Dumbledore and Harry are telling the truth about You Know Who being back."

I buried my head in my hands. "All right, give me a minute. I need to make head and tail of this, it really has been a bit much." Silently, I mused over what Mad-Eye had told me, my thoughts spinning. I didn't know how long I had sat there, thinking things over while feeling Mad-Eyes eyes on me before I finally raised my head again and met his eyes.

"All right. If you trust Dumbledore, then so do I. I trust your judgement and if you believe they are telling the truth, then so do I."

One of Mad-Eye's rare smiles lit up his badly scarred face. "Good girl. I'm proud of you. There's only one thing I have to reprimand you of."

I raised my eyebrows in question and then grinned in realization. "Ah, right. All right then, tell me. What did you say to me when I had finished with my Auror training?"

His grin broadened. "You are going to make a hell of an Auror, missy, if you don't break your neck first tripping over your own feet. Very good, but next time ask the security question the moment you meet me. Especially after what happened last year at Hogwarts. And no, don't give me that look, I don't want to talk about it right now. We have more important things on our hands. So, you say you believe me. You believe that You Know Who is back?"

I nodded, taking a gulp of my water. "I do."

Mad-Eye nodded, seemingly satisfied with my answer. "Good. Have you heard of the Order of the Phoenix before?"

The Order of the Phoenix, yes, that did ring a bell. Racking my brain, I took another gulp of water thoughtfully before it finally hit me.

"Yes! The Order of the Phoenix, wasn't that the anti-You Know Who alliance during the First War? A group of people who had openly opposed and fought him?"

Mad-Eye nodded again. "Yes, indeed. I was one of its members, along with Dumbledore, Minerva McGonagall and a few other teachers, the Potters and their group of friends, including the traitorous bastard Pettigrew, Benji Fenwick, the Prewetts, the Bones, the McKinnons and so on and so on. Good people, every single one of them, except for Pettigrew. There are only few of us left of the original order. But right now as You Know Who is on the rise again, Dumbledore has called the Order of the Phoenix together again. Once again, we will oppose him. We are also recruiting new members, people we trust enough with all of this information and who we consider up to the task of fighting him. So, what do you say? Will you join us?"

I was struck speechless for a moment, feeling a wave of warmth coursing through me. Mad-Eye considered me a talented enough witch to oppose one of the most able and dangerous wizards of our time. I knew that I should probably feel terrified of the idea of actually fighting him and of working against the ministry, who had dubbed Dumbledore a raving old lunatic, but most of all, I felt flattered and excited.

"I will. Of course, I will. You can count on me, Mad-Eye." This earned me another smile, this one with a definite hint of pride at my reaction.

"I knew you'd be with us. I'm glad to know you at my side again, baby girl. But I want you to think the consequences through. You will have to work against the ministry, against your employers. You will have to spy on them and keep the information I have divulged to you from them. And most of all, once there's war again, you will be one of the prime targets as one of the members of the Order and in grave danger."

I simply shrugged. "If it should come to that, I believe everyone will be in grave danger. Believe me, I am aware of the consequences but you know me better than to believe that they will discourage me. I've given you my answer and to that I'll hold."

"Then all that's left to say is this: Welcome to the Order of the Phoenix!" Mad-Eye reached out and took my hand in his, squeezing it gently.

I smiled at him. "Thank you for believing in me, Mad-Eye. Now, are you going to tell me more about the Order? And what about Sirius? Is there any chance I can contact him or see him?"

"Yes, as a matter of fact there is, as Sirius is currently in London and will probably stay here for quite a while. As for the Order, meet me the day after tomorrow at five P.M at the square in front of the ministry. I'll take you to Headquarters and I promise I'll take you to see Sirius."

And he had kept his promise. I had spent the last two days in a state of excitement and nervousness, still trying to wrap my head around everything Mad-Eye had told me. That very evening I had gone to see my mother, and to my surprise, I had met Dumbledore there, in the process of telling my parents everything Mad-Eye had told only a few hours before. I had only seen my mother cry once before, the day she had received the news about Sirius supposedly being a murderer and being shipped off to Azkaban.

Once Dumbledore had finished, he had waited for my parents to react. But both of them had been struck speechless, staring into space. Finally, my mother had jumped up and stormed out of the room but not quick enough to disguise the first sob that escaped her. Mum had always loved Sirius like a younger brother and she had never been able to believe him capable of the atrocities the rest of the world believed him to have committed.

And neither had I. I had come to accept the fact but somehow deep down, I had always wondered and hoped that there had been some mistake. All the more excited I was, to discover that he really was innocent after all and that after all these years, I would finally see him again.


	4. Chapter 4

_Note: Hello everyone and thanks so much for reading my story! Reviews are very much appreciated as well. So, this story will be Tonks's POV again but I promise, the next one will written in Remus's POV again. I can't say I am too happy with this particular chapter, it feels a little bit like a filler chapter to me. I still hope you lot will like it, though. I don't know when I will be able to update, as I will be leaving on an excursion this coming Saturday and still have a lot to prepare over the course of the week but I will certainly try to find some time to write. In the meantime, happy reading._

Tonks's POV:

Current day:

And not only was I finally able to see Sirius again, but Remus as well. I tried to watch the two of them from my place across the table as discreetly as possible. They looked older of course and both very much marked by the things they had had to live through, but I still recognized the young men I used to know. Sirius had always been handsome with his long black hair and his silver eyes and even Azkaban had not been able to rob him of this particular attribute. Still, he seemed rougher around the edges somehow and a lot graver than I had ever seen him before. Nevertheless, as he had scooped me into his arms to greet me and grinned at my way of handling his mother, I had recognized the cheeky, playful man I used to know.

And Remus, well, Remus was a different story. He had been watching silently as I greeted Sirius, laughing at us but not making any move to greet me. Whereas Sirius had been as touchy feely as always, Remus had kept his distance and had barely spoken five words since I had met him. He looked a lot older than I remembered him, his light brown hair streaked with a bit of grey, which did not nothing to deteriorate from his handsomeness and he was dressed in clothes that had clearly seen better days. His face, though, seemed as youthful as ever, despite the grey in his hair.

As Dumbledore spoke, I kept my eyes on the two men across from me, watching them. I could tell that both of them were not really listening to Dumbledore's words, as they had an identical faraway look in their eyes and were staring off into space, probably lost in old memories. I did not know whether it was a trick of the light but I thought I even saw tears in their eyes at one moment.

After a while, the two of them exchanged a glance and then suddenly, Remus' eyes lifted and met mine.

I could feel a pang in my chest. For years, I had been hoping to look into those eyes again. All these years, I had been missing the four of them, especially Sirius and Remus. I had come to accept the fact that I would never see James, Peter and Sirius again but Remus… Remus had still been very much alive all this time, he could have come back any time. But he didn't. He never came back. I had never seen him again.

And now that I did, I didn't really know what I was feeling. Joy, most of all, for seeing two of the people I had loved the most as a kid. Pity and pain for all that he had had to go through. God, what must he have been going through? Three of his best friends dead at the hand of the fourth one. I had never known much about Remus as he had never liked to talk about himself much. But that much I knew: the guys had been the only family he had. What must it have been like for him to have this family ripped away from him from one day to the next? To find himself all alone in this world? I could not imagine the pain he must have gone through.

Finally, he looked away again and focused on Dumbledore. Yes, I certainly felt joy and pain, but there was also disappointment. Disappointment that he had never come back for us. Disappointment that he had not seemed nearly as happy as Sirius to see me again. Would he even have recognized me if not for Sirius? Did he even remember me?

It was so weird. Sirius and Remus had always been like family, I had loved them with all my heart as a child. But now… they were like strangers. We hadn't seen each other in fourteen years.

As Moody gently nudged my side with his elbow, I finally managed to focus my thoughts at the conversation at the table once again.

"As the first official meeting is tomorrow, I had thought that those of you who do not have any important engagements this evening, might stay the night and assist Sirius in cleaning the house. Knowing Walburga Black, I'm guessing this might take quite a bit of time." He chuckled gently.

Molly Weasley looked over at Sirius. "If you don't mind, I would very much like to stay here for a while. We can help you with the cleaning and as we will probably be spending quite a bit of time here at Headquarters anyway, it would probably be easier to stay here. Is that all right with you?"

Sirius nodded enthusiastically. "Yes, of course! The more the merrier. This house is far too big for Remus and me, anyway. What about the other children?"

"Arthur will bring Ron and Ginny along as soon as he gets home after work. Are you sure you don't mind us staying."

Sirius shook his head energetically. "No, no, I am delighted, actually. I was dreading staying here all alone and with Remus and your family as company, it should be a lot more bearable."

Moody shot a questioning look my way, to which I responded with a simple shrug.

"The two of us would like to stay the night as well. Tomorrow is your day off, correct?" I nodded at Mad-Eye's question and then whirled around.

"Hey, how on earth do you still know my work schedule?" Mad-Eye just shrugged but the twinkle in his eyes was not lost on me.

"Oh, I knew it! You're still paying visits to Scrimgeour and keeping an eye on everything, aren't you?" I grinned, having suspected as much for quite some time.

"I'm afraid we have not yet had a look into any of the bedrooms, so I have no idea what you might find in there." Sirius gave us all an apologetic look.

Moody just grunted. "Don't worry, I'll have a quick look at them, check for anything dangerous. Tonks, you coming?" Nodding, I got to my feet and followed Mad-Eye out of the kitchen and up the staircase.

"Charming, this place." I cast a disdainful look at the severed elf heads and shuddered. "God, this is repulsive."

"So was the family who lived here. Except for Sirius, he's all right, I suppose. Always been a bit of a reckless hothead but his heart is in the right place."

Having reached the first one of the bedrooms, Mad-Eye turned around and exchanged a quick look with me, silently telling me to be careful. I just rolled my eyes and held my wand at the ready as he slowly pushed the door open.

Seeing as how he did not seem to have spotted anything dangerous right away, I proceeded to the next room. It was a big bedroom with a double bed in it. Except for the fact that nobody seemed to have cleaned in there for quite some time, I did not notice anything of the ordinary. Nevertheless, I decided to take a closer look and stepped into the room.

Unfortunately, I had been way too focused on spotting anything out of the ordinary in the room, that I did not pay any attention to the floor, which was cluttered with things. Before I knew what had happened, I slipped and crashed headfirst into the desk next to the bed.

"Bloody HELL!" My voice seemed to be magnified ten times in the gloomy silence of the house, echoing of its walls, as I lay spread-eagled on the floor, wincing at the pain in my leg and head. To make matters worse, there had been a vase on the desk I had crashed into, which had fallen to the ground and shattered.

"FILTH! HALFBLOODS! HOW DARE YOU BEFOUL THE HOUSE OF MY FATHER'S!"

Mrs Black's screeching mingled with the sound of Mad-Eye's voice. "You still alive?"

"Yes", I groaned, letting my head fall onto the ground in embarrassment. Just great, of course I had had to curse loud enough to wake up Sirius' mother again and alert the whole house.

"What happened? God, Tonks, are you all right?" Sirius' anxious voice made me wince again and as I slowly raised my head, I caught sight of him and Remus appearing in the doorway, seemingly out of breath while Mrs Black was still shouting her head off.

"Yep. I'm fine." Pushing myself into a sitting position, I winced at the broken vase next to me and quickly raised my wand to repair it.

"Don't you worry about her, she does this all the time. And do me a favour and shut up your mother, Sirius, she's giving me a headache."

"You sure you're ok?" Sirius had taken a few steps closer and crouched down to look at me whereas Remus had disappeared, probably in order to deal with Mrs Black.

"Yeah, I am. I'm sorry for causing such a mess. I must have tripped over one of those books scattered everywhere." I scowled at the offending objects before gladly taking Sirius' hand and letting him help me up. Wincing, I rubbed the spot on my head where I had hit the desk and gave Sirius a wry grin.

"Remember that I used to trip and knock things over all the time as a kid? Uh, yeah, I still do."

A grin spread across Sirius face. "Seriously? Guess that should keep things interesting around here." The shouting had finally stopped and a few seconds later, Remus appeared back in the doorway. "Are you hurt?"

I glanced at him and shook my head. "Maybe one or two bruises but nothing worse, don't worry." Opting for a bright smile, like I wasn't humiliated by my clumsiness at all, I shook out my pink curls and glanced around the room suspiciously. I could swear that the moment I had hit the floor, I had heard a low chuckle coming from somewhere inside this room.

At that moment, though, there was another commotion from downstairs and once again, the now familiar shrieks started ringing throughout the whole house. Sirius closed his eyes for a moment, grumbling something unintelligible under his breath and then turned around and strode off.

"I'll handle it, you help Mad-Eye and Tonks with the rooms", he tossed over his shoulder at Remus, who had moved to follow him.

"Can't you shut her up?" Mad-Eye's growl made Remus turn around again and with a sigh, he shook his head.

"The only thing that gets her to quieten down is to put her to sleep but unfortunately, she is a very light sleeper and wakes up at the first sign of a commotion. It drives Sirius crazy."

"Yeah, well, not only Sirius. I'll go and have a look at it. Can the two of you handle the rooms?" Mad-Eye's black eye turned into my direction, giving me a questioning look while his electric blue eye was swirling madly around in its socket, trying to have a last quick check of the room.

"I'm an Auror, Mad-Eye. I certainly think I should be able to deal with this."

Moody grunted, his eye still fixed on me. "Do not underestimate Walburga Black. She certainly was a most unpleasant woman, but a very able witch and she certainly knew her way around Dark Magic. If I am not mistaken, there will be quite a few unpleasant surprises waiting for us around here. If you need me, just call out and I'll be there in a second."

As he disappeared, I turned back around and let my gaze roam the room once again, stopping at the portrait in one corner of the room. Curiously enough, instead of wizard looking back at me, I was met with … nothing. Just blank space.

Intrigued, I stepped closer and took a closer look.

"It's the portrait of Phineas Nigellus, Sirius' great-great-grandfather or something. He was Headmaster of Hogwarts during his lifetime, so he apparently alternates between the portrait in the Headmaster's Study and the one here in this place."

Remus had stepped next to me, gave the portrait a quick look and then opened the dresser next to it, checking it for any suspicious contents.

"Huh. I guess that explains the laughter."

Remus' gaze snapped towards me and he raised an eyebrow in question. "Pardon me?"

"I thought I had heard someone laughing at me when I fell on my arse just a few minutes ago. Someone within this room. Guess I'm not going mental after all. Must have been this Phineas guy."

His lips pulled up slightly. "Do not let him catch you call him that. I've met him when I was a kid. He's very easily offended."

Brushing back my pink curls, I leaned closer to the portrait with a grin. "Let me guess. It was Sirius' favourite pastime back then to aggravate him, wasn't it?"

A hoarse chuckle came from Remus' direction and when I gave him a look, he was gazing off into space, smiling reminiscently. "Yes, indeed. This used to be the Black guestroom. We stayed here only this once, but I'm pretty sure James and Sirius managed to make Phineas Nigellus hate us forever after that single evening. They kept bugging him so much his head turned bright red and looked about ready to burst, yelling his head off about rotten blood and the decay of the Noble House of Black."

"Charming, those ancestors of mine." I kept my voice light and joking as I gently poked the portrait with my wand, hoping to see a glimpse of the man we had just been talking about, hoping to be able to pay him back for laughing at me.

"Can't dispute that."

We spent the rest of the room check mostly in silence, concentrated on the task at hand and only talking when it as necessary. There wasn't anything dangerous to be found in any of those rooms, except for a few minor protective enchantments and hexes. Somehow, this didn't reassure me at all and obviously, Remus seemed to be thinking among the same lines.

"I'm wondering what we might have overlooked. It just doesn't seem right to me."

I shrugged. "Well, guess we'll find out once we actually sleep in these rooms, won't we? All we can do is hope that we're not throttled in our sleep by Mrs Black's vengeful spirit."

Remus huffed a laugh. "Throttled? Oh no, the Mrs Black I knew would have opted for something much more sinister, involving dark magic and a knife I'm guessing."

"It's enough that I have to hear her yell every few seconds, can everybody just stop talking about my wretched mother?" As I turned around, my eyes found Sirius leaning in the doorway, watching the two of us with a grim expression on his face.

"You all right there, Padfoot?" I gave Remus a curious look at the use of this peculiar nickname.

Sirius just grunted and ran a hand through his dark hair. "Been better. But I've spent twelve years in Azkaban, so I've certainly been worse."

At Remus' dark look, Sirius gave him a sheepish grin. "Too soon for Azkaban jokes?"

"Little bit." Remus closed the drawer of the desk he had been checking and turned around. "Any progress with your Mum?"

Sirius' dark look spoke volumes. "Not even Mad-Eye has found a spell yet that will shut her up permanently. Well, anyway, are you about finished here?"

At our nods, a smile broke out across his face. "Splendid. So, what do you say, fancy a butterbeer up in the living room? Everyone else is downstairs in the kitchen, talking strategy and everything. I doubt they will miss us. And the three of us have quite some catching up to do, haven't we?"

"Oh, yes, I'd love a bottle of butterbeer." I smiled at my cousin, who winked at me, obviously pleased at my enthusiasm and then gestured towards the hallway.

"I'll get a couple of bottles from the kitchen. You two go on up. Remus, I trust you still remember where the living room is."

A few minutes later, the three of us had settled down in the living room upstairs with a bottle of Butterbeer in our hands. Sirius sat next to me on the comfortable red sofa while Remus had settled down into an armchair.

"All right, Tonksie. So, tell us about you. As we've missed the last fourteen years of your life, we have a lot to catch up on."

Taking a swig of my Butterbeer, I just shrugged. "Honestly, I don't really know what to tell you. My life is not that exciting."

Sirius huffed a laugh. "Uh, yeah… you're a witch, you're an Auror and now you're a member of the Order of the Phoenix, a secret association to fight one of the most dangerous Dark Wizards of all time. No, your life is really not that exciting. Not at all."

I rolled my eyes and threw a pillow at him. "Oh, cut it out with the sarcasm." Even though I had to admit that he was right… if he put it like that. But I'd never tell him so to his face.

Sirius, who had caught the pillow with ease, chucked it back at me and settled back into the couch with a grin. "I am right, though. No, seriously. Tell us about yourself. Where do you live, how are your parents, how was your time at Hogwarts, did you have a good childhood, do you like your job at the ministry, what's your relationship status… that kind of thing."

Sighing, I imitated his posture and tried to get more comfortable before answering.

"Ok, so… I live in a tiny apartment not too far away from the Ministry. My parents are just fine, even though my mother recently received quite a shock when she was told that her favourite cousin had escaped from Azkaban, where he was supposed to spend the rest of his life for killing a fellow wizard and a dozen Muggles; and when Dumbledore than told her roughly two years later that said cousin was innocent after all. Apart from, that… yeah, they're great." A soft smile spread across my lips as I saw my parents' smiling faces in my mind's eye. "Still madly in love even after all these years."

"I imagine. Those two have really found their soulmate in each other." Sirius usual smirk had been replaced by a soft smile, his eyes focused on the bottle in his hand.

"Yeah, I suppose they did. Ok, uh, what was the next question again… uh, yeah, Hogwarts, I think. I loved it there, even though I missed my parents a lot. But I had a great time there." I chuckled, thinking back to the seven years I had spent there. "Even though some of the teachers might have been quite glad to be well shot off of me after graduation. Caused quite a bit of trouble, you know." Grinning at the two of them, I playfully flicked my bright pink hair and winked. "Being a metamorphmagus has its advantages, you know."

Sirius laughed out loud. "You will have to tell us all about that sometime, all right?"

I shrugged and nodded with a grin. "And well, most of the time I do like my job even though I don't really agree with the Ministry and the position they are taking regarding certain issues most of the time. But still, I have a great job and I can actually make a bit of a difference, so I won't complain. And as for my relationship status, don't be such a nosy bugger, Sirius."

His eyes raised in mock outrage. "Nosy bugger, me? Never! And why won't you tell us? Does my little cousin have some dirty little secret she wants to keep quiet?" He waggled his eyebrows at me suggestively at which I simply rolled my eyes.

"If I had I certainly wouldn't tell you." Let him make of that what he wants.

"Oh my God, don't tell me – ", Sirius let his voice trail off suggestively, staring at me with wide eyes.

Oh no. Whatever it was he was thinking, I had a feeling I was not going to like it. "What?"

"You and Mad-Eye?" I should have known better to take a sip of my Butterbeer before hearing his answer. I nearly sprayed both of them with the contents of the bottle as I nearly choked, causing Sirius to roar in laughter and Remus to chuckle softly.

"NO! God, no! What on earth gave you that idea?"

Sirius shrugged, leaning back with a grin and crossed his arms over his chest. "Well, the two of you seem pretty close. I don't think I've ever seen him like that with anybody. And I've certainly never seen anybody stand up to him like that."

I shuddered at the thought. "For heaven's sake, Sirius! Mad-Eye was my mentor back during my rookie days. He's like a father… or some sort of grumpy uncle. I love him to bits… but not like that that. Ugh, that thought is simply revolting!" Before he could jump to any other conclusions, I fixed him with a hard stare. "Before you come up with any other disturbing ideas… no, I don't have a dirty little secret, there's no one in my life at the moment, all right? There's actually been no one for quite a while as I have only recently finished Auror training and therefore, have not had much time on my hands for these kinds of things. Satisfied?"

Sirius shrugged and muttered something unintelligible under his breath, which made Remus choke on his Butterbeer and throw him a warning look. "What was that?" I gave the two of them a curious look.

"Nothing. Sirius is just being a pig." Remus' eyes were still fixed on Sirius, shaking his head at him. His lips were definitely twitching, though, a fact, which was not lost on Sirius, who gave him a broad grin. "I'm not even sorry about that, Moony."

"What about you? Mad-Eye told me you've been on the run for quite some time now, Sirius. Ended up anywhere interesting?"

"Not really. I didn't really dare stay for longer than a couple of days wherever I ended up. I spent some time in Turkey and Greece, but mostly I tried to remain as close to Harry as I could, lying low at Remus' or in a cave near Hogsmeade. It's not really much of a glamourous life, being a fugitive, so I'll just spare you the details."

I snorted loudly. "Glamourous? Do I look like I care about life being glamourous to you? C'mon Sirius!"

That earned me a proud look. "That's my girl! Guess Andromeda raised you right."

"Yeah, Mum's the best. We met her sister and her husband once in Diagon Alley by chance and I just happened to be wearing a Muggle band shirt and ripped jeans that day. Uh, yeah and I guess I should add that my hair had been bright turquoise that day. Narcissa nearly bust a vein when she set eyes on me." Remembering my aunt's horrified face, I chuckled and wound a strand of my hair around a finger.

"So you're still changing your hair a lot?"

I nodded. "Yeah, I guess. Depends on my mood. And I have to morph a lot for the job. Because of my abilities, I mostly get the missions involving disguises."

"But when you morph in your spare time, it's mostly just the hair, isn't it?"

I nodded, feeling a stab in my chest and did my best to ignore it. "Yeah, I don't like to mess with the rest of my body. I like to morph but I still want it to be me, you know."

"Do you have a favourite? Like, do you change your hair colour every day or just whenever the mood hits you?"

Shrugging, I took another swig of Butterbeer, rolling the bottle in my hands. "The latter I suppose. Whenever I feel like it. Sometimes, I wear the same colour for weeks, sometimes I feel like something new three times a day. But mostly I opt for pink so I guess you could say that it's my favourite."

Automatically, I raised my eyes to meet Remus' gaze. His lips had pulled into a light smile and he looked right back at me. He remembered what he had told me years ago, I could tell.

After a brief silence, Sirius cleared his throat and set up straight. "Am I the only one who thinks this is a bit awkward? How about we loosen things a bit and combine catching up with each other with some fun." He waggled his eyebrows when he said fun, which made me wonder just what fun constituted for Sirius. Remus seemed to be thinking along the same lines, as his eyes met mine and I couldn't help but notice the apprehensive look on his face.

"That depends… what are you thinking of?"

With a manic grin, Sirius winked at us, emptied his Butterbeer and then leaned forward to place the bottle onto the table. "Who's up for a little game of Truth or Dare?"

"Please tell me you're joking? C'mon, Sirius, no! I suffered through enough rounds of these infernal game when we were kids!" Remus flopped back against the back of his armchair with a groan, closing his eyes.

"Oh, c'mon, Moony, don't be such a party pooper." For the first time since I had set eyes on Sirius again, I saw the grimness leave his eyes and face, making him look much younger. He grinned at his friend and gave him the puppy dog-eye look I remembered just fine. "C'mon, Remus, please? Pretty please?"

"There are only three of us!"

"Doesn't matter. Say yes, c'mon!" Remus groaned again and then opened his eyes again to look at me. "What do you think?"

I simply shrugged and grinned at the two of them. "Well, I'm game, I suppose."

"Oh no, you're not!"

All three of us whipped around at the sound of Mad-Eye's growl. Without our noticing, he had entered the room and was now glaring daggers at the three of us.

"Hey there, Mad-Eye. Fancy a butterbeer?" Sirius grinned at him, twirling the cap of his own bottle lazily between his fingers.

Mad-Eye's black eye narrowed. "No, I don't. And just what do you three idiots think you're doing, huh? It would certainly make a great impression to turn up bleary eyed and nursing a hangover at the first Order meeting."

"And just since when do you care about making a good impression?" I raised my eyebrows at my mentor, who shot me a dirty look.

"Besides, it's only Butterbeer." Sirius rolled his eyes.

Remus, though, got to his feet and grabbed his and Sirius's empty bottles.

"No, Mad-Eye's right. We still have quite a lot to do tomorrow, we haven't really made that much progress cleaning the house. Wouldn't hurt if we managed to get an early start."

He rolled his eyes at Sirius's expression. "Oh for Christ's sake, Padfoot, stop pouting already. I promise you, sometime this week, we'll play this stupid game. You'll get your chance to humiliate your cousin eventually."

"Yay me." I got to my feet as well, mussing up Sirius's hair in passing, which made him scowl at me and then followed Remus into the kitchen, where he was getting rid of the empty bottles; Sirius strolling in only a minute later, with an unmistakably disgruntled expression on his face.

"Where am I supposed to sleep anyway?" I gave him a questioning glance, leaning against the counter and brushing my hair out of my face. I couldn't deny the fact that I actually was tired.

Sirius came to a halt right next to me, his forehead creased in thought. Before he could answer, though, Remus spoke up from his place across the kitchen.

"The room at the end of the second floor on the left is quite nice. You should be comfortable there, I think. And just in case you need anything, Sirius and I share the room right across from you."

I raised my eyebrow suggestively. "The two of you are sharing a room? Is there anything I should know about?"

A loud snort escaped Sirius, whereas Remus, who had just taken a sip of the glass of juice he had just poured himself, nearly spit it back out, coughing violently.

Grinning, Sirius reached over and pounded onto his friend's back with his hand before turning back around to face me with a cheeky grin.

"So I guess that means you don't know, huh?"

I raised one eyebrow in question. "Know what, exactly?"

Sirius casually slung an arm around Remus's back, the latter still busy with trying to stifle his coughs. "The two of us were actually engaged to be married, before the first war took its toll. But we have done our best to catch up on all the years we have lost. So, I'd like to apologize in advance for any … ahem, sounds, you might hear from our bedroom at night."

The corners of his mouth had started to twitch violently halfway through his sentence. Remus, who had finally stopped coughing, rolled his eyes and pushed his friend away, giving him a dirty look.

"Merlin, Padfoot, do you ever shut up?" Shifting his gaze towards me, he rolled his eyes again, even though his lips had pulled up a bit as well. "We've only decontaminated six of the bedrooms, so a few of us will have to room together." He cast another dark look at Sirius. "Unfortunately."

Sirius threw up his hands in mock outrage. "Can't a man make a joke around here? Where's your sense of humour, Moony? And … oi! At least I don't snore."

"You talk in your sleep, though."

"And I'm sure listening to me talk is just as entertaining at night as it is during the day." Sirius gave him a cheeky grin.

"My point exactly. It's not only boring but annoying as hell." Remus grinned at his friend, a surprisingly malicious look on his face.

Sirius huffed in mock-outrage, pressing one hand against his chest as he turned to look at me with an imploring look on his face. "Cousin? Would you care to weigh in?"

Chuckling, I simply shook my head. "Not really, no. But by all means, carry on. You're quite entertaining."

I raised my hand to stifle a yawn. "Or on second thoughts, don't. I'm too tired. Second floor, last room on the left, you said?"

Remus pushed back from the counter. "I'll come with you, I think I'm going to hit the sack as well."

I glanced at Sirius. "Aren't you coming?"

Sirius shook his head. "No, I want to have a word with Mad-Eye and Molly. Besides, I'm not tired yet."

He stepped towards me, his cheeky grin replaced with a warm smile as he pulled me into a hug. "I've missed you, little cousin. Sleep tight, all right?"

I gave him a smile in return. "You too, Sirius. Good night."

"And you should be thankful we didn't make you room with Mad-Eye. He would probably shake you awake in the middle of the night or wake you up by shouting 'constant vigilence' in your ear."

A huff escaped me. "Actually, you're not wrong."

Both Sirius and Remus looked at me in interest but I just winked at them. "But that's a story for another day. Good night, Sirius."

Remus and I made our way upstairs in silence, only speaking when he pointed out the bathroom and my room. I hated this awkwardness between the two of us. But, maybe due to my tiredness, I couldn't think of anything to breach this uncomfortable silence between us.

Finally, we had reached our destination and Remus came to a stop, clearing his throat.

"Well, good night Nymphadora."

Raising my eyebrows, I narrowed my eyes at him. "What did I say about using my given name?"

Remus looked startled for a moment before remembering and then gave me an apologetic look. "I'm sorry. Old habits die slow. Good night, then, Tonks. Sleep well."

"You too." As I turned around to close the door of my bedroom behind me, I thought I had heard him murmur something under his breath. Something that sounded suspiciously like "The pink's still my favourite". I was not at all sure whether I had heard correctly or whether I had just imagined it but it made me smile nevertheless.


	5. Chapter 5

_Note: Hey there everyone. I managed to update after all. I was in bed with a bellyache all day yesterday and then, at night, I found that I just didn't manage to fall asleep. So, I just decided to write instead. So, I wrote this chapter in the middle of the night, so if it sucks, I am so sorry. And, yes, I am aware that it is once again a bit sad but I promise, the next chapters will be much happier and focus less on the war and more on Tonks and Remus. Like I said, I don't know when I will be able to update next but I will try to continue writing as soon as possible._

Chapter 5

Remus

 _Where's the "good" in goodbye?_

 _Where's the "nice" in nice try?_

 _Where's the "us" in trust gone?_

 _Where's the "soul" in soldier on?_

 _Now I'm the "lone" in lonely_

 _The Script – No Good in Goodbye_

The business of the day had finally passed and Grimmauld Place 12 had finally quieted down. The silence bordered on eerie, actually, after all the noise and liveliness of the previous day.

Most people had trouble falling asleep because of noises nearby like snoring or the sound of the highway. In my case, it was the exact opposite. It was the silence, which prevented me from sleep. I had spent seven years sharing a dormitory with three other teenage boys and I had gotten used to the constant level of noise that came with it. Even at night, it had never been truly quiet. There had been Peter's snores, James's loud breathing and Sirius's occasional mumbling and tossing and turning. To me it had become some sort of weird lullaby. And as weird as that might make me, after graduation I had found that I missed it. That I had trouble falling asleep without these noises. Without the knowledge that my friends were right there beside me, only footsteps away if I should need them.

The looming silence in the bedroom told me that I was not the only one who was still awake. Sirius was prone to moving around a lot in his sleep, tossing and turning every few seconds, either mumbling or even shouting at times. But right now, he did do nothing of the sort. He just lay there, curled up on his side, motionless and silent.

After a few more minutes of trying to fall asleep, I finally surrendered and got up, as quietly as I could despite knowing full well that there was quite a good chance that my friend was still as wide awake as he was. I tiptoed to the window and leaned on the windowsill after opening it, closing my eyes, rejoicing in the cold breeze on my face. Letting out a deep sigh, I finally opened my eyes again and glanced up at the stars. The night sky was clear for once, no clouds in sight. Just the stars and the weak crescent of the waning moon.

"Do you think they are out there somewhere? Watching us from wherever they are now?" Sirius's voice was barely audible, muffled by his pillow.

Startled, I turned my head to look at him. He was still curled up beneath the blanket, facing away from me. Without a reply, I returned my gaze to the night sky, biting down onto my lower lip. I didn't have to ask him what he meant – I knew he was talking about James and Lily.

"I don't know. I like to think so." My lips pulled into a bit of smile. "I can almost hear them at times, chastising me, teasing me, telling me off." Shaking my head, I leaned down onto the sill again, staring off into the night.

"I know what you mean. I could practically hear Lily screaming at me back in the Shrieking Shack, telling me off for how much of a dramatic idiot I was being and for scaring Harry. And hear James's laughter in the background, see his eyes twinkling in amusement as he tells her that after all these years of knowing me, she really should know better. That dramatic idiot was the only mode I had."

I huffed a quick laugh. "Sounds accurate." Brushing a hand through my hair, I sighed. "They would have been so mad at me for quitting my job at Hogwarts. James would probably have called me a noble brat, telling me how I was taking the easy way out while Lily would have raged on, shaking me while telling me repeatedly that I should not care about what other people thought about me. That the people who really mattered would always love me… no matter what. That I should not let it get to me."

Sirius chuckled. "Yeah, she would. She would probably have punched Snivellus in the face personally. You know, I would still love to punch him for it, if you would just let me. Or hex him. Take your pick."

Rolling my eyes, I couldn't help the grin that spread across my face at these words. "Not that I don't appreciate this offer, Sirius, but please don't. Severus is a member of the Order of the Phoenix as well, it would not to do to start fighting amongst ourselves. The only way we will have a chance of prevailing against Voldemort will be a as a united front. This is no time for petty grudges."

A loud frustrated sigh came from the direction of Sirius's bed. "Why do you always have to be so bloody reasonable, Moony?"

"Hm, let me think… because my best friend is about as much of a reckless hothead as you can get? Someone needs to be the voice of reason, after all."

"Yeah, yeah. You're the brain, I am the looks."

I couldn't help but smile at the teasing lilt in his voice, reminding me of his younger, more carefree self.

"Keep telling yourself that, old man."

His only response was a chuckle, followed by silence.

I kept looking out at the deserted neighbourhood and the seemingly endless night sky, letting my thoughts drift idly. Of course, the events of today came creeping up on me again and the faces of the Order were flashing in my mind's eye one after another. Sweet, kind-hearted Molly with her warm smile and twinkling eyes, her cheerful husband, sombre Kingsley Shacklebolt, fierce Mad-Eye Moody and all the rest. How many of us would be able to make it through this war unscathed? How many would make it at all?

Against my will, another face came to me. Big brown eyes were twinkling at me teasingly. Sighing, I closed my eyes and pressed my knuckles against them. What had Mad-Eye been thinking, bringing her along? She was much too young, she had no business fighting in this war.

I should know. I had been even younger back then. We had still been children in many ways, thrilled at the opportunity to fight Voldemort at first. Ecstatic even. We had the opportunity to make a difference, to actually engage in battle, to rid this world of the Dark wizard threating it. But in truth, we had only been playing at war. And much too soon, we had discovered that it was no mere play. That there was nothing glorious about this war. But still, we had fought on. The visions of being the dashing hero had soon be replaced by the dark, devastating reality but we had fought on. And many of us had lost their lives in this war, or their friends and family. One thing was for certain: none of us had escaped unscathed. Yes, Voldemort had been defeated and his Death Eaters scattered and most of them convicted but still… we had bought this outcome at a great cost.

"Do you think we will be able to do it again? Defeat him?"

Sirius sounded almost childlike as he mumbled that question.

I shrugged. "I don't know, Sirius. But if we didn't have any hope, we wouldn't be standing here, would we?"

"It's depressing, isn't it? So many good people gave their lives in the first war… and in a way, it has been for nothing. He's back, he's returned, maybe stronger than ever."

Turning around, I glanced at my friend, who had sat up, his arms slung around his knees. "Then it's up to us now to make sure that their sacrifice was not in vain. To make sure that they did not die in vain."

Sirius's eyes met mine. "How on earth could I ever believe that you were the traitor?" His voice was soft, barely a whisper.

Walking over towards the bed, I sank down next to him. "Trust me, I ask myself that same question every day… How could I believe that you could betray us like this? You, who had proven at so many different occasions that you would do anything for your friends. But well, it is the way it is, Sirius. It was war. War can do strange things to people. Strangers become friends and friends become strangers … or sometimes even enemies. We wasted enough time as it is, let's just put this behind us. We know the truth of it now."

Sirius nodded. "I'd die for you, Remus. I would have died for any of you. And I know you would do the same for me. This time, don't let this war get the better of us, all right? No matter what happens, there will always be the two of us against the world. No matter what happens we will be able to trust each other with our lives."

I was quiet, simply looking at him, feeling my throat closing up with emotion. Sirius swallowed audibly, raising his eyes to meet mine again.

"We were not just friends, Remus. We were family. The five of us, we were this big happy family. Now there's only the two of us left. You're the only family I have left now, Remus. I lost you once. I will not lose you again. No more lies. No more withholding information. If something is up we talk to each other. Like we used to do when we were kids. All right?"

Without saying a word, I simply nodded and reached over to hug him. Yes, he was right. He wasn't just my best friend, he was family. The only family I had left.

"Except for Harry."

Sirius pulled out of the hug in surprise, blinking at me for a moment before a grin spread across his face.

"Yeah, you're right. Except for Harry." He chuckled lightly, shaking his head. "When all of this is over, we'll make quite the lovely family, don't you think? The Boy Who Lived, the mad Fugitive and the Professor slash werewolf."

I huffed a laugh. "Enough to give anyone a headache, to be sure."

Suddenly, Sirius's grin changed… there was suddenly a hint of mischief in it. Raising my eyebrows at him, I crossed my arm over my chest, fearing the worst. I knew that look just fine, it practically screamed trouble.

"What?"

He shrugged nonchalantly, leaning back against the headboard casually, grinning at me.

"Oh, I was just thinking that maybe someday we'll be able to add someone else to this lovely family of ours."

"Like who?"

Sirius raised one eyebrow. "Hm, let me think… like little Tonks? Duh?"

Gritting my teeth, I tried to opt for nonchalance as well. "What gives you that idea?"

Sirius's grin broadened. "I observe, my dear friend. I observe." With that, he winked at me, grabbed his blanket and got comfortable again, closing his eyes.

"Good night, Moony. Sweet dreams."

I remained seated in the same position for quite a bit of time, staring at him without even really seeing him, pondering his statement. Whatever did he mean? Finally, I decided that it was much too late to get any real thinking done and I imitated Sirius, getting into bed as well. The slight whimper and unintelligible murmur on my right brought a smile to my lips.

"Good night, Sirius." With the familiar sound of my sleeping friend, I soon drifted off to sleep as well. Still, his words had left his mark. I fell asleep with the image of Nymphadora's face before my eyes.


End file.
